Why are we so good at helping others, and lousy at asking for help for ourselves? Asking for help can make us feel uneasy, perhaps because we were raised to be independent or maybe we don’t want to look “needy”, or maybe we are so used to dealing with everything in secret, not letting the world know the truth of what is happing in our homes and inside of us.
For me, independence was a sign of strength, but now I know that I was really not wanting people to see that on the inside, I was crumbling.
It’s been a long journey for me learning to ask for help. It’s taken me years and I can not believe I waited so long. This is why I’ve compiled a list of reminders for you. Turn to this list each time you put off reaching out for support. Let this be a reminder of why it’s great to ask for help.
1. You’ll get further, faster with help
Everything is more enjoyable, easier and faster when you ask for help. Consider who you feel is in your support system. Who can you turn to? This could be friends, neighbours, family, colleagues at your work, professionals. There are lots of organisations that are there to help, even free of charge. The sooner you get help, the easier it is to resolve the challenge that you face. The longer you put off asking, the harder it becomes and the challenge grow too, often requiring even more help. The sooner you ask for help, the sooner you realise the beautiful life you are wanting to live.
2. You’ll discover how fabulous it feels to have a little weight lifted off your shoulders
This is a feeling that I absolutely love. You can feel the tension leave your body and the tonne of bricks are lifted off of you. People are happy to help. It makes them feel good too. Just ask, stop struggling. Ask, and you’ll see how wonderful it fees to get help.
3. It builds your courage
Not everyone will say yes, so asking for help more often builds both your courage and your ability to deal with rejection. The worst that can happen is someone says no. It’s good to get a few no’s and learn not to take it personally. Sometimes people have too much on the go and simply can’t help. It’s noting personal, they are just good at observing their own boundaries and taking care of themselves. Ask someone else who may be in a better position to help.
4. It builds your relationship and connection with others
We are social creatures. We weren’t designed to do everything alone. When we ask others for help, it builds a connection with that person, a connection that can grow into a beautiful relationship.
5. It gives you something to be grateful for
Feeling grateful, feels fantastic, It a happy felling, a positive feeling. That moment when someone helps you, it simply warms you on the inside. It’s a good feeling, so just ask for help, s you can feel it too.
The great thing is, the more you ask for help, the better you get at t and the easier it becomes. You’ll also get good at creating an equal exchange of energy, when you are in a position to offer to return the help. Everyone wins when you ask for help, so start.
Reaching out for support is stage 2 on the Pathway to Peace Healing Journey. Learn to ask for help and it will accelerate your healing and recovery. Take the Ask For Help 30-Day challenge and get comfortable and good at asking for help.