How to create calm

As I stood on the platform, waiting for my train, the pace of the steady stream of announcements over the loudspeaker quickened. Delayed. Cancelled. Cancelled. Delayed. A little bit of snow and plummeting temperatures brought London to halt. I was on the last leg of my journey, headed south, thankful for my warm coat, my scarf and my gloves, both pairs. Doubling up was a smart decision this morning. So was the blanket in my backpack.

I took some deep breaths and looked around at the fresh blanket of white. And while I smiled on the inside, others around me huffed and puffed, rushed, shouted and pushed past. A weary-looking man blurted out, “I’m having an awful day. The worst day of my life.”

I simply caught his glance and gave him a compassionate look, acknowledging that I heard him.  He wasn’t alone. I too was late. I should have been leading a full-day session with a client, but instead, I was standing on the platform watching the unravelling happening all around me.

I stood there bouncing on the spot to keep warm, a bit like a penguin dance. The thought of how that might look made me smile even more, hopefully, it made others smile too. Next, my side stretches, arms raised above my head and over to the side. I must have looked a trick on the platform. Bending forward into mountain pose was easing my aching back. Who needs a yoga mat, just do what you need to do wherever you are.

I could have chosen the go on and on about the delays, the cold, and the stress. And A few years back, when life was spiralling out of control as my husband’s alcohol dependency progressed, I would not have seen anything to be grateful for. It has taken me time to learn the importance of calm and how I could create calm at any moment, no matter what was happening in life.

So how do you create calm?

First, it is recognising that calm is not the absence of chaos. It is being calm amid the chaos around you.

Secondly, calm is knowing there is nothing you need to find or change to feel calm. It is knowing that every experience is the same because it is the essence of you.

The needing and the doing to create calm will only magnify the lack of it. Instead, you will come to the place where you no longer feel the need to do things to experience calm.

And that is precisely how you create calm.

Kim Moore Blossome

About Kim Mo0re

Kim lost her husband to alcohol dependency in 2017. She created the Blossome Community to help others enduring losing a loved one to alcoholism or addiction find a Pathway to Peace so they can let go of guilt/shame and live with self-compassion and joy.

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