You can’t predict when grief is going to sweep over. Managing waves of grief is challenging, as often, they strike at the most inconvenient times. Grief struck me on Friday night while I was with a group of friends on a hen night in London, all dressed up in 1950’s outfits.
As we walked along the Thames in awe of the London skyline, I was reminded of the power of places. In an instant, I was transported back in time to the days when Chris, my husband, worked at CIBC with offices looking out onto the river.
I had been here before. Many times.
I had spent many days pushing my son in a pushchair along the Thames, taking Hugh to see the sights, as we waited for Chris to finish work and meet up for dinner. When I saw the HMS Belfast the biggest wave of grief hit. It could see everything as thought we were on the ship, looking around with nanny and grandad. As the tears welled up, I slowed my pace, and dropped back behind the group.
I let it all wash over me. Accepting it for what it was, the sadness took its hold. The tears came, and I started to do some breathwork.
Inhale… 1,2,3,4,5
Exhale 1,2,3,4,5 and longer…
And again.
And again….
I wasn’t bothered what people would think. I just let it all flow, knowing it would eventually run its course. It always takes less time than you think. It only took a few moments, but in that brief period of time, years washed over me, and I was able to find a smile, a good smile, from remembering the happy days, hearing Chris” infectious laugh.
And then I could hear the group.
I quickly caught up and headed to the Bridge Theatre, ready to watch the show, Guys and Dolls, feeling a little bit lighter for having released some emotions that have been tucked away somewhere deep inside.
Everyone’s healing journey is their own, but you don’t have to travel it alone. Join the Blossome community for support and encouragement while you relearn how to take care of you. Build healthy new habits, stay accountable and keep moving forward with your healing, so that one day, you’ll remember the happy memories, and open up to joy once again. You are worth it. Join the Blossome community.
Kim Moore is the Founder of Blossome CIC. She lost her husband Chris to alcoholism in 2017. She faced a difficult journey while raising 2 children alone, with her family living on the opposite side of the world. Kim founded the Blossome Community and The Pathway to Peace healing journey so no one would have to feel alone while enduring the trauma of a loved one’s battle with alcoholism or addiction. She is also on a mission to end the generational cycle of alcoholism and addiction in families.
